Two Dead People Having A Conversation

And this morning I'm talking to my niece. She died on December 27th of 2018 (asthma attack) and I died on August 12th of 2018 (cold/flu, ischemic stroke(s), heart attack (takotsubo syndrome), dislocated vertebrae C5 fell down flight of wooden steps during heart attack, severe asthma attack). Survived CPR and seve so uses of the defibrillator. You might not believe it but I actually take pretty good care of myself, and I think you'd have to do to survive what I went through. I remember an awful lot of what happened to somehow. Nothing about anything I experienced makes any sense. It beats any logical or rational explanations!!! Scientific or medical.

We were both revived, obviously. I don't even know how to begin to tell you how strange any of this is. we were having this conversation on messenger tonight and I laughingly said, LOL two dead people having a conversation.

I read a lot about medical science and the things that are happening they are unbelievable. I also believe that nothing can happen without our own personal inner faith and belief and that of others too when so combined, that we all work together towards progress and than miracles for.

I'm the results of hundreds of people working thousands of hours at the Western Maryland health system. I am the result of failures before me and a learning curve. I am the success that was planned for and achieved and work towards. I could be a glimpse of the future, where we have an opportunity to extend life. I am a cyborg today by definition. I'll probably get all those shitty jokes just like Dick Cheney, my ex father in laws friend. Anything beat the f*** out of feeling like I did for the last 20 years plus, and doubted the entire time !!! Through modern technology I'm reborn and I feel it. I'm regaining strength and stamina but this is a serious heavyweight fight and I'm in it to win it. When I'm dedicated I don't f*** around and this is the only focus I have. For nothing else matters but friends and family but you have to work hard to hold the grips on the reigns of  life... and of course there's still no guarantee ever.

I can just tell you that there's a better place coming in there's not paying their and there is not fear there and there is an all-knowing this and there is a silent type of communication and this place that we go it is not anything of the earthly existence but it is everything of the cerebral existence. This great Castle in the sky has given me an inner calmness but the event that happened to me as still shaking my foundation as far as my nerves are concerned but those reverberations are calming. I am being forged into something I know not what to expect yet.

if you think all this sounds like it's crazy to read, try living it and waking up to the reality of it every day.

I can't wait to get back to normalcy and you wouldn't believe the things I've already been attempting, and doing. I've never been one to be scared to live, because death has always been fast on my heels since birth.

Keep your faith and build your faith strong.

Never give up but know when to not fight back too.

Trust your deep inner voice of intuition.

Step forward in life without fear.

Thank you for the emergency and medical professionals that save lives !!! I'm in eternal awe !!!
E

Broken Hearted Takotsubo Cyborg ~ Poetry ~ Mobius∆Tripz

Spend time not too long weeping whence a heart so easily by another so crushed, life a currency better spent in positive appreciated balance,
surrounded by friends and family of love, in our wake of yesterdays,
our shared memories forgotten in the passage of time melting away behind us... meaningless eventually,
but painfully so,
a death experienced indeed upon this journey now we are forever together united upon,
and indeed in that way,
a bright future so quickly downstruck...
and so now,
free as always once again,
love,
as always,
eludes me,
like before and certainly again...
once more,
or truly,
perhaps,
I've no heart left anymore,
it will always be you,
last and most I loved and adored.

I'm done !!!,
I bow in defeat at your feet,
my Queen,
my Love,
who I will always love and adore...
who I'd have served this way,
always faithfully,
forevermore,
however denied in silence,
never now can you know the honor that was our love.

I knew beauty once and she stopped a minute to stay with me,
she is so divine.

Forever,
we share that "together" forever,
no better eternity,
I once knew love,
and she,
me.

Perfection in Plutonia

Love once looked into my blue oceanic  eyes,
a soulfelt reflection from the other side of a heartfelt attraction both bodies so warmed,
but again as usual,
I knew like always before and in anticipated perfect rhythm,
I patiently awaited for you to peacefully depart,
in perfect timing as for me always precisely repeatedly before,
she'd make her exit,
she'd have to leave as always before,
once more,
and this time I'd be honored incarnate,
waiting in love on call at anytime from here and forward forever onward,
I'm yours at anytime,
a simple lovingly beckoning desire,
I'm always now and forward forever yours.

Love, so always elusively,
teasingly,
tantalizing,
temptingly close...
escapes me,
once more,
I'm devastated.

It was my dying devotion and love for you that let me return to life,
and it is a life I will apparently never get to share but rather only through dreams,
this love in life heartbreaking,
a cyborg's heart aches "ner'again" no more.

I died as human,
revived with CPR and a defibrillator of multiple uses,
a pacemaker retrofitted to mend my mortal devastation,
but my heart can never be truthfully for love,
or ever again,
restored...
crushed... my most adoring love so offered,
other than for convenience,
fully emotionlessly,
ignored.

Crushed ~ ... because I did nothing but love and adore,
now permanently defeated,
a broken-hearted,
takosubto,
cyborg.

Reaching Nirvana Together With Less Wreckage

Who was greatly responsible for the overall sound that we identify as Nirvana???

It's easy to think it's Kurt Cobain. It's been simple to think awake maybe it was Dave Grohl. Then upon even further inspection think about Courtney Love. How about just their Producer / Engineer ??? Anyone else ???nyo you see you get mentioned and not enough credit ?Isn't that really usually the case?

We like to package things with one of face associated with it's like presidencies. that one person gets to own or eat everything. They get full credit or full blame.

Be good to the people that you meet today and those that you know because it might be that you all are going to build something beautiful and influence the world for generations to come if you work together. If your complete s*** to one another, there may be nothing at all.

It really doesn't matter who gets the individual credit oh, like the paragraphs above they were wasted space and time and do nothing for your future. What's important to draw from this is only that you work beautifully well together and build something wonderful and share it... and be good to one another through that process.

The pain was all about ego & $$$, too many died in the inensity of life's fire, that could have stayed alive, selfish failure for not together surviving and reaching higher.

What Is A Kratom House ??? ~ Treating Addiction / Revovery ~ Kratom Kills Addiction

Cumberland, Maryland has a great and deep history, like being a part of the underground railroad.

Would you be a part of what would be called a " Kratom House " ???

Would you NOT support something that can effectively wipe out addiction to heroin and narcotics ??? Do your own due diligence and so understand, no answer goes without risk.

Would you help those that are addicts to find the easier softer way and regain their footings in their life??? ... or like most of mainstream America today, will you turn your back and just hope the problem takes care of itself ???

Perhaps instead, you have both sympathy and empathy and you look forward to a future Wendy's terrible times don't exist. These times affect us all, regardless of if you want to accept that fact or not.

To get to the point...

It would be incredible if there were places to go where folks could show up once or twice a day and drink a cup of tea with others and not have these terrible cravings for the multitude of reasons that addicts become addicts.

Imagine what would happen if a few people working together got the word out about how wonderful illegal and inexpensive product worked to help curb the appetite of narcotics, or even completely just walk away from it in short order.

There are all kinds of articles online about what the DEA and the federal government wanted to do with this compound but you can study it and do your own due diligence and you can find out for yourself that for a long time this has worked for multiple cultures.

I'm going to point out the future topical discussion that will scare people more than anything, and that is...

This is not  unlike pureleaf unrefinedcocaine, where the active ingredient(s) could be isolated one day in the laboratory. If this happens, we are going to have super serious problems. MG & 7HMG are powerrful molecules that are related to gardenia and coffee, respectively. The first has been classified as a narcotic with it affecting the opioid receptors and the second molecule is quite closely related to coffee.

You can try multiple different species of Kratom and typically between 6 and 8 grams is a perfect dose for both a little stimulation like coffee itself, as well as a little analgesic pain relief like Tylenol.

If you do more than that you just stupid ! As it will make you tired and therefore would be defeating of the stimulant within.

Wonderfully it does not slow the respiratory system, like narcotics, at least in its natural form as a powdered leaf made into a tea for example.

What I cannot find information on is does it cause heart tissue damage, or cardiovascular damage, or pulmonary damage as examples but not limited to these categories. my guess is that as long as it's been used which is thousands of years, it's never been studied, and that brings me to our last and closing point...

We must do something about federal law and the aspect that when something is banned by federal law and a scientific studies can be conducted. We have obviously found that this is a flawed system and we did not realize that in the beginning. With science today, we can see with clear logic and rationale where our thinking was flawed in the past and where we should be able to in a limited range, study these molecules 100% so that we understand there medical and or medicinal value and precisely how they work the human body's intricate systems.

But back to the point in hand most importantly of all...

Would you set your house up as a crate time has where people could come over and gather in the backyard around a grill or a fire pit and just sip tea and then after an hour to get together is over?

Would you help and take your time and contribute to Getting America Clean Again ???

In 2017 alone, we lost more people to narcotics and overdose can we did to the entire Vietnam conflict !!!

Help put an end to that today !!!

Become a member of or start a local"Kratom House" near you !!! ... and stand strong for it to continue to be a perfectly legal compound as a natural leaf form.

Kratom Kills Addiction

Host a Kratom House today. Change the culture of of your city one life saved at a time.

You'd also have information about local healthcare and doctors  offices and the health department, etc. ... at these impromptu get together Kratom Houses.

Ideas to consider / organize around

No paperwork

No $$$ exchanged

Not for profit

Only in a home, as a sterile environment doesn't promote the warmth of price the soul needs and lacks within these suffering addicts.

Do Your Due Diligence !!!

https://www.consumerreports.org/dietary-supplements/new-danger-with-kratom/

Kevin Spacey Consumed

Kevin Spacey

An actor and artist I adore for his skill-sets, maybe second to none ... and a miserable sot of a human being it seems is deeply internally haunted and unable to reveal his true self too the world... well, I'll wait there... He is a loaded topic !

But, in all of his big picture work... sticking to the focus of his art (likely deeply influenced by his "reality"... yikes... but I get it too and if you don't... you've maybe not lived at all)

So back to the point... why not a role and lead un a movie / series titled, "Napoleon" ???

Will you watch him today ??? or does he leave you feeling at least a little ill, like a decent poe'm.

Imagine his Telltale Heart !!!

Is he more like the rest of us or not?

His future from this date forward is certainly a curious one and I can only imagine a very Shakespearean ending, fitting of this menace genius.

I could love to hate this guy forever... think now back to American Beauty.

Yeah, that was a touch of throw up you just tasted !

I just bet we are all more like him then not !

Looking forward to the story that will play out and be his life eventually in the past... falling down like a collapsing house of cards. Brilliant

He's probably aiming for that, but we can only imagine.

The best artists spark imagination... sometimes through pure dark terror. He is indeed enveloped in blackness... consumed and haunted.

I think he'd be a brilliant Napoleon, and convey an invaluable message to others through history that is a priceless lesson.

Death While Awaiting Social Security Disability Decision

I died while waiting for the third time !!!... and I'm still denied ;(

Most inefficient system ever !!!

Disgusting dis-service designed to feed $$$ to attorneys !!!

Who is being served here ???

We spend more funds trying to help restore the lives of those who wait for this stagnant process.

Was I understand stress I'm asked ??? Oh no, not at all !!!

https://amp.usatoday.com/amp/2420836002

Thoughts ~ Thoughts from Who Knows Where

To be blessed is to always know your already alive in The Garden of Eden, but to be, on the other hand, cursed, is to know you are bound in to blackness.

How we think is how we feel. How we feel follows our actions.

Do you curse or bless yourself today... and what of your tomorrow?