There's definitely a different speech pattern or impediment to my speaking compared to the way it used to be if you were going to do a quantitative or qualitative analysis, however to somebody that didn't know me they would just think I was being silly so it's easy to play it off with a wink or a smile or laugh or just say well you know I had a heart attack stroke thingy event to my friends that know me, etc, etc, but on a deeper level, there's this undermining confidence which has already always been at play throughout the decades as memory has been like the tide that ebbs and flows. It would always return to the proper levels but it definitely had this rhythm to it. I know the rhythm of my health. but psychologically at this other level, there's this undermining that goes on and to think about that tide just kind of pulling away a little bit of the he is going to be sustained grade underwater that makes up the short that can't be seen and how that would weaken and weaken and weaken that shorefront and maybe that shorefront is where confidence has a small cabin.
It seems like every time there's a mistake that is spoken, or audible, that if it is obvious to me that it was a mistake then it's like that bigger wave just came you took more of that sub shoreline surface away.
even when there's not, there's the neuroplasticity that runs me through the process to evaluate it and it seems like this is where things start backfiring because there's this repetition.
it's the repetition along with PTSD or ADD ADHD that has a very negative reinforcing behavior it seems because somehow instead of just being a normal loot that should be run for all personal safety measures, it's running such a way that it ramps up your body chemistry and that is not a good thing especially over a long extended. Of time and especially coinciding with other traumas most of all.
I often, purposefully, speak more slowly now and this only builds my confidence and it is also important because it lets me practice and find what I am still okay with, which is really 99% of my previous knowledge or maybe 98, and then after making these evaluations oh, this old dog will exercise his new tricks realizing that if there are certain places with restrictions now, just steer in another direction safely and carefully and in a pre-planned pre chartered way, to the largest degree possible where statistically they would be the most likely the best outcomes that are authentic and genuine.
neuroplasticity will have you jumping to the same place as quantum leaping in the mind however you can learn to take the steps into that more slowly and even speaking out loud to yourself is a very helpful tool.
I appreciate voice recognition in so many regards, but in regards to it being a useful tool for rehabilitative speech therapy is incredibly important to understand and it is also incredibly important to understand how powerful this is in a therapeutic sense.
