The Alcoholic Before, After My Sudden Death Heart Attack Perspective

I once drank like a complete and absolute lunatic. I had reasons and tolerance and deep pain. Only after August 12, 2018, can I finally see myself then as others did. I'm deeply thankful to feel evolved in those regards. I'm not interested in alcohol and I understand fully it's inherent evils and pitfalls when abused, and it's a shame our society glorifies it so, but it's valuable, and as it creates euphoria and is marketed precisely yo entice you and it's always available. That's freedom. Be careful with it! My primary point here was to apologize for the man I never was and I'm growing into... finally.

If you have issues with this garbage... I'm always here to chit chat too. There is something deeper at issue, and that's the hurt we must remove, root and all.

Let's all heal together now and make the rest of this run super worthwhile. Don't forget the suffering, you already know who they are. I was suffering back then, and then even made others suffer ;( ...I glorified it and was a poor example and promoted a lot of insanity with very always willing friends...I always found boatloads of them. I admit to great memories too, but holiday dark sin-filled days and nights to any alcoholic would fully understand. Even a non-alcoholic that had one bad night in life would understand.

The ill are mostly left alone, to fight and fend for themselves while their rationale and reading have departed. They desperately need love and attention and close proximity, are volatile and need a caring direction. All else is a set up for failure and an impossibility towards and healing, reconciliation, or rejuvenation, or rehabilitation, etc.

Please, as you have done for me...keep the I'll on the right path towards help and gentle living guidance before that day will never be available soon.

Diseases of the mind and body can and do leave the ill with the worst discretion if any. We should take a real look at ourselves and society and try to mend and heal the ways not fruitful.

I'm glad the guy I once was isn't hurting himself today. He was once so ridiculously abusive to himself and then pretty controlled for a few decades, but often in an internal struggle. I don't know that feeling today as deeply.

I've no words yet, maybe ever, for some of my recent traumatic, completely non-alcohol related, experience. I just know I'm deeply thankful to those that saved me last year and those that have guided me and offered me refuge from myself for a lifetime.