He walks into the barroom With his shoulders standing tall A gentleman of discipline Who never bends at all He's got a lifetime full of stories That he keeps behind his lips But there's a little devil waiting For a couple little sips
First beer loosens up his collar Second puts a grin upon his face He starts telling jokes about his marriage That he wouldn't tell in any other place Then he leans across the table Says, "Boys, I'll tell you this!" The bartender starts laughing 'Cause he knows what's coming next!
TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! How many does it take to flip the switch? TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! A little liquid courage and a bag of tricks! Two beers and the truth starts talking Three beers and the room starts rocking Six beers and the whole damn world's gone slick! TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX!
At two he asks permission At three he takes command At four he's telling everybody How to run the promised land At five he's got a theory That'll fix the human race At six he's giving orders To a lamp across the place!
He says, "My wife runs the household!" Then he winks and shakes his head "At least that's what I tell her When we're climbing into bed!" The whole damn bar erupts in laughter He just orders one more round Says, "I've commanded bigger armies But she runs this little town!"
Now the colonel's on the dance floor And the judge is singing blues The preacher's telling dirty jokes And somebody's lost his shoes The quietest man in the county Has become the loudest prick And the bartender's taking wagers On beer number six!
TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! How many does it take to flip the switch? TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! A little liquid courage and a bag of tricks! Two beers and the truth starts talking Three beers and the room starts rocking Six beers and the whole damn world's gone slick! TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX!
TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! How many does it take to flip the switch? TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! A little liquid courage and a bag of tricks! Two beers and the truth starts talking Three beers and the room starts rocking Six beers and the whole damn world's gone slick! TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX!
TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! How many does it take to flip the switch? TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! A little liquid courage and a bag of tricks! Two beers and the truth starts talking Three beers and the room starts rocking Six beers and the whole damn world's gone slick! TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX!
TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! How many does it take to flip the switch? TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX! A little liquid courage and a bag of tricks! Two beers and the truth starts talking Three beers and the room starts rocking Six beers and the whole damn world's gone slick! TWO BEERS! THREE BEERS! OR SIX!
"Who the hell authorized this?"
